The situation...
Shaquita was writing out a rap and I couldn’t understand what she meant by the words she was using. Then I started to realize…imma = I’m going to, and me and you and you (she is talking to her audience), and as for me I’m….a different approach to a language I have known all my life. Is this how Gemma felt when we joined her for breakfast or how we felt when we were in England. So many questions started running thru my mind. Is this what they mean when they say the FCAT is unfair or talk about literacy rates being so low, why is it that someone born at the same hospital as my son, grew up 5 miles from our home and is English speaking sometimes hard for me to understand.
Is it a lack of books, time spent learning, is it early education, what is the answer.
Body language, learned for me at an early age, eye contact, personal space, even tone completely different for these girls these wonderful young women.
They don’t trust me, but have I ever done anything to warrant that, they don’t answer my questions, why should they…2 weeks ago they began using my name, most didn’t know it or care to know it until almost 2 months of being together. Why is this the case? It drove me crazy to the point of asking for their forgiveness if I didn’t know their name or I called one sister Shakeelah by the name of her sister Gayleen.
I tell these girls they can change their world, this circumstance, the lives of those around them. They can go to college, be whatever they want to be. Do I believe this? Do I believe that this is possible. Why is this my dream for them. What is wrong with their circumstance, what is wrong with the lives around them, is my life so perfect?
I see grandmothers, aunts, sisters taking care of someone else’s child. A father of one becomes a father to many, isn’t this how it is supposed to be? Why are there two extremes, the white way of to each his own and their way of it takes a whole community to raise a child.
Then I sit in Service, the answer isn’t an FCAT with a different way of asking questions, or that they use my name. The answer is God and love and this will be what changes both my world and their world for his purpose for his good and holy purpose. We should take care of one another, we should know how to read and understand Gods word. It is our privilege that we live in a nation where opportunity is boundless and if God is given the glory for all things then all things are for his glory, college, goals reached, safe surroundings. To God be the glory great things he has done, to guide and protect us he gave us his son.
What a journey I am on, how blessed I am to know these children, his children. Lord I pray for their safety, for their smile for them to know God’s love, for them to achieve their dreams if it is Mercy Drive or another side of the world. I pray for them to love Jesus and trust him. I pray for them to believe in themselves because you are in them. For their parents, for their pastor, for their aunts, grandmas, brothers and sisters. For my children to know their children for us to love, trust and walk thru life together as your church as one church.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Drill Baby Drill
Hearing a whole stadium chanting drill baby drill last night left me feeling a little sick to my stomach.
Now I realize how beneficial it would be for us to use our own oil and not be dependent on unfriendly countries for our energy.
BUT....
Is drilling the answer?
I worry that the resources put into creating huge pipelines, more drills, etc. will just push off the recognition that we need to stop burning oil and not leave it to our children and their children to clean up our mess. Our world is changing because we burn fossil fuels at an alarming rate, people unable to defend themselves from our pollution are dying at alarming rates...but here we have a lady who is 44, not even the "boomer" generation but our generation vowing to "drill baby drill"
Our parents, and we love them, raised us on McDonalds, boxed dinners and processed everything..the mindset of give it to me now, give it to me fast, and if I want it just charge it. I want my children eating healthy foods, not constantly wanting more stuff, understanding the benefits of saving and spending....I want them to leave this world a better place then it was when they got here. Big handprint...small footprint
Now I realize how beneficial it would be for us to use our own oil and not be dependent on unfriendly countries for our energy.
BUT....
Is drilling the answer?
I worry that the resources put into creating huge pipelines, more drills, etc. will just push off the recognition that we need to stop burning oil and not leave it to our children and their children to clean up our mess. Our world is changing because we burn fossil fuels at an alarming rate, people unable to defend themselves from our pollution are dying at alarming rates...but here we have a lady who is 44, not even the "boomer" generation but our generation vowing to "drill baby drill"
Our parents, and we love them, raised us on McDonalds, boxed dinners and processed everything..the mindset of give it to me now, give it to me fast, and if I want it just charge it. I want my children eating healthy foods, not constantly wanting more stuff, understanding the benefits of saving and spending....I want them to leave this world a better place then it was when they got here. Big handprint...small footprint
Saturday, August 30, 2008
Who will I vote for...my thoughts
How do I vote?
Prolife means to me that I am for all life. I cannot differentiate between the life of an unborn child and that of a grown adult.
I watched the politicians on Rick Warrens interview...he asked when is it okay to sacrifice American Lives and they both said right away "for our freedom"...why is the questions sacrifice American Lives less controversial then the question about abortion. I don't believe that fighting a war for economic purposes, oil or even to detain criminals is somehow okay...
For some reason I hear people say to me but he is prochoice but then the next sentence talk about how important it is to continue the war, to stay the course and secure the area. I have never for one moment thought that my freedom was at stake even before Sadaam Hussin was removed from power. We live in an evil world where things like September 11th can happen. They weren't trying to take over our government or take away my right to vote....they are simply responding to their struggle and our interferance in their politics, their struggles...and our uninformed and uncaring solution to the problem of the middle East. Reading form beruit to jeruselem was pretty eye opening for me.
Although I agree with so much Barack Obama said, I also agree with McCain. I don't want to live in a socialist country where everyone has everything because the government gives it to them. This seems scary to me that a governing body would control so much. I do think that private enterprise is such a valuable part of America. But we have gotten so out of wack, the greed of the previous generation in every area has made for a very sad economic condition where the amount of poor and destitute around the world is staggering. A plane can cost a billion dollars...are you kidding me....nothing is worth a billion dollars...not one thing.
I feel like I am rambling but these thoughts are so convuleted and maybe as I write, rewrite and get it all down it will somehow help me to come to a conclusion.
Prolife means to me that I am for all life. I cannot differentiate between the life of an unborn child and that of a grown adult.
I watched the politicians on Rick Warrens interview...he asked when is it okay to sacrifice American Lives and they both said right away "for our freedom"...why is the questions sacrifice American Lives less controversial then the question about abortion. I don't believe that fighting a war for economic purposes, oil or even to detain criminals is somehow okay...
For some reason I hear people say to me but he is prochoice but then the next sentence talk about how important it is to continue the war, to stay the course and secure the area. I have never for one moment thought that my freedom was at stake even before Sadaam Hussin was removed from power. We live in an evil world where things like September 11th can happen. They weren't trying to take over our government or take away my right to vote....they are simply responding to their struggle and our interferance in their politics, their struggles...and our uninformed and uncaring solution to the problem of the middle East. Reading form beruit to jeruselem was pretty eye opening for me.
Although I agree with so much Barack Obama said, I also agree with McCain. I don't want to live in a socialist country where everyone has everything because the government gives it to them. This seems scary to me that a governing body would control so much. I do think that private enterprise is such a valuable part of America. But we have gotten so out of wack, the greed of the previous generation in every area has made for a very sad economic condition where the amount of poor and destitute around the world is staggering. A plane can cost a billion dollars...are you kidding me....nothing is worth a billion dollars...not one thing.
I feel like I am rambling but these thoughts are so convuleted and maybe as I write, rewrite and get it all down it will somehow help me to come to a conclusion.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Today
As days go this one was pretty perfect.....perfectly ordinary yet perfect....how is that ordinary?
I am reading a book called words every kid needs to hear and it talked about how most kids are wonderfully ordinary, I don't think I agree with that. I think that each of us are uniquely and wonderfully made but are anything but ordinary.
I used to think that people were easy to figure out by watching them, seeing what they wore, drove, where they lived...not so....when I started listening to people I began to realize that each person, wealthy, poor, happy, sad each has a unique story that is all their own. I don't believe that we all have unique struggles or desires yet somehow each story is different, each voice a different tone, some similar but not exact....one creator with such an artistic hand.
Watching Planet Earth was the first time I really noticed or said to myself our God loves diversity, not that each thing be totally different from the other, but subtle yet beautiful variences, a scale or red, or a coat of chocolate, eyes of green or of gray blue.
so back to my day....
I woke up about 6:15 and thought good time to read the bible, light is filtering in thru the windows the house is quite, but where is it...oh no it is by the computer in the other room...oh well I will just lay here and drift in and out of sleep waking up slowly....then I started thinking about Heart of Mercy...oh how I am excited to work with this church....excited to be volunteering again, excited about how I might be stretched, touched and grow...how selfish is that, but so true, volunteering always does so much more for me then it does for anyone I think I might be helping. I know the words are all wrong and that everything I do good isn't me doing it it is God. Yet when God is about doing his good is when I feel the closest to him....so lets go!!
Jude started to stir at 7:11 and Julian was awake by the time John had gotten Jude from his crib so incomes both boys in Johns arms to snuggle me in bed, but there wasn't a lot of snuggle..apparently it was time to play! I made grits for breakfast, apple juice in the cups a quick sweep of the floor, let the dog out with food and water. Potty time, wash hands, up to the table...God our Father God our Father once again once again thank you for our blessings thank you for our blessings amen amean and the boys started eating. John showered and handsome and ready for work. PB&J's, throw 2 quick lunches together in the superman and batman lunch boxes, our bag is ready from yesterday, mom needs her suit on, boys need jammies off and suits on.....but potty first --- Yeah Jude!! it is 8:43 and out to the car on our way to Jason and Melissa's to swim. We get there about 9:30 and off to the pool, swimming, diving, cannonballs, 2 trips to the potty - yeah Jude!, mommy swam some laps, talked about ICS, Julian's a little fish about 10:45 everyone is ready to go play on the playground. This one had a huge web and spiderman Julian loved to climb it. Jude fell off a strange blue thing and hit his head on the other strange blue thing but right up and back to playing....hmmm Melissa is hot lets go to another park, okay. But home first, showered and changed, I fed the boys PB&J's and visited with Jason and Bonnie...cash system, cars, debt, church, tithing the conversations each unique yet important, real struggles, real concerns at 11:30 we were off to the other park by Keene's Point, a huge park under a great canopy (but really huge canopy) the boys played. Julian called it his obstacle course, Sadie ate some cherrios, Bonnie and I chatted, she is living in San Jose...there was an earth quake in CA today, Heather didn't like it. At about 12:30 it was time to go. Cookies in the car and a stop by church. Mailings aren't ready, Andy is getting ready to buy a house, Tracy is no where to be found, and the boys are running up and down the hall by the offices screaming very loudly. Back in the car to home. Home, ahhhh, nap time, potty - yeah Jude and off to sleep, I check e-mail and messages. Work to do, find some light options, dimension some plans, return some e-mails, look at the tile submittal, 2:30 time for a break....bible reading, still Jeremiah, Isreal is in big trouble, false gods = not good! plot revealed and propheting continues..3:00 maybe a little sleep? 3:09 "What" "What" Julian yells across the house, sometimes he talks in his sleep and then wakes himself up, me too!! Oh well, snuggles, curious George and then off to the computer for video games, I try to fall back asleep, NO SUCH LUCK, so make the beds, put sheets on the bed upstairs, Dad will be here in a week, change laundry, shower, and yes a quick game of Suduko, Jude is awake 4:30, potty time - yeah Jude, shoes on, in the car 5:04 call John, he'll pick up mailings off to chick-fil-a...eat eat eat...playground! Jenna and Andrew come, boys ready for ice cream, Daddy shows up, eat eat eat....pictures/playground, the DR was great! J/A=great! $$$ hard!!! boys done, pictures over to home. Jammies on, potty time - yeah Jude! Mom played suduko dad got the boys ready for bed, FAST then even read them a story, time to tuck in, lots of kisses and hugs (and just a few tickles) lots of laughs then off to bed. Need a babysitter for Friday or Saturday, call emily, facebook...time to stuff envelopes, Regina called - is reading "HELP MEET" a wifes handbook, enjoyed wedding, told her about HOM, Levi isn't feeling well. envelopes almost done, missing cards, e-mail to see if anyone has some and here I am blogging about my days in endless runon sentences.....a perfectly ordinary day, I am ready for bed! Good night!
I am reading a book called words every kid needs to hear and it talked about how most kids are wonderfully ordinary, I don't think I agree with that. I think that each of us are uniquely and wonderfully made but are anything but ordinary.
I used to think that people were easy to figure out by watching them, seeing what they wore, drove, where they lived...not so....when I started listening to people I began to realize that each person, wealthy, poor, happy, sad each has a unique story that is all their own. I don't believe that we all have unique struggles or desires yet somehow each story is different, each voice a different tone, some similar but not exact....one creator with such an artistic hand.
Watching Planet Earth was the first time I really noticed or said to myself our God loves diversity, not that each thing be totally different from the other, but subtle yet beautiful variences, a scale or red, or a coat of chocolate, eyes of green or of gray blue.
so back to my day....
I woke up about 6:15 and thought good time to read the bible, light is filtering in thru the windows the house is quite, but where is it...oh no it is by the computer in the other room...oh well I will just lay here and drift in and out of sleep waking up slowly....then I started thinking about Heart of Mercy...oh how I am excited to work with this church....excited to be volunteering again, excited about how I might be stretched, touched and grow...how selfish is that, but so true, volunteering always does so much more for me then it does for anyone I think I might be helping. I know the words are all wrong and that everything I do good isn't me doing it it is God. Yet when God is about doing his good is when I feel the closest to him....so lets go!!
Jude started to stir at 7:11 and Julian was awake by the time John had gotten Jude from his crib so incomes both boys in Johns arms to snuggle me in bed, but there wasn't a lot of snuggle..apparently it was time to play! I made grits for breakfast, apple juice in the cups a quick sweep of the floor, let the dog out with food and water. Potty time, wash hands, up to the table...God our Father God our Father once again once again thank you for our blessings thank you for our blessings amen amean and the boys started eating. John showered and handsome and ready for work. PB&J's, throw 2 quick lunches together in the superman and batman lunch boxes, our bag is ready from yesterday, mom needs her suit on, boys need jammies off and suits on.....but potty first --- Yeah Jude!! it is 8:43 and out to the car on our way to Jason and Melissa's to swim. We get there about 9:30 and off to the pool, swimming, diving, cannonballs, 2 trips to the potty - yeah Jude!, mommy swam some laps, talked about ICS, Julian's a little fish about 10:45 everyone is ready to go play on the playground. This one had a huge web and spiderman Julian loved to climb it. Jude fell off a strange blue thing and hit his head on the other strange blue thing but right up and back to playing....hmmm Melissa is hot lets go to another park, okay. But home first, showered and changed, I fed the boys PB&J's and visited with Jason and Bonnie...cash system, cars, debt, church, tithing the conversations each unique yet important, real struggles, real concerns at 11:30 we were off to the other park by Keene's Point, a huge park under a great canopy (but really huge canopy) the boys played. Julian called it his obstacle course, Sadie ate some cherrios, Bonnie and I chatted, she is living in San Jose...there was an earth quake in CA today, Heather didn't like it. At about 12:30 it was time to go. Cookies in the car and a stop by church. Mailings aren't ready, Andy is getting ready to buy a house, Tracy is no where to be found, and the boys are running up and down the hall by the offices screaming very loudly. Back in the car to home. Home, ahhhh, nap time, potty - yeah Jude and off to sleep, I check e-mail and messages. Work to do, find some light options, dimension some plans, return some e-mails, look at the tile submittal, 2:30 time for a break....bible reading, still Jeremiah, Isreal is in big trouble, false gods = not good! plot revealed and propheting continues..3:00 maybe a little sleep? 3:09 "What" "What" Julian yells across the house, sometimes he talks in his sleep and then wakes himself up, me too!! Oh well, snuggles, curious George and then off to the computer for video games, I try to fall back asleep, NO SUCH LUCK, so make the beds, put sheets on the bed upstairs, Dad will be here in a week, change laundry, shower, and yes a quick game of Suduko, Jude is awake 4:30, potty time - yeah Jude, shoes on, in the car 5:04 call John, he'll pick up mailings off to chick-fil-a...eat eat eat...playground! Jenna and Andrew come, boys ready for ice cream, Daddy shows up, eat eat eat....pictures/playground, the DR was great! J/A=great! $$$ hard!!! boys done, pictures over to home. Jammies on, potty time - yeah Jude! Mom played suduko dad got the boys ready for bed, FAST then even read them a story, time to tuck in, lots of kisses and hugs (and just a few tickles) lots of laughs then off to bed. Need a babysitter for Friday or Saturday, call emily, facebook...time to stuff envelopes, Regina called - is reading "HELP MEET" a wifes handbook, enjoyed wedding, told her about HOM, Levi isn't feeling well. envelopes almost done, missing cards, e-mail to see if anyone has some and here I am blogging about my days in endless runon sentences.....a perfectly ordinary day, I am ready for bed! Good night!
Monday, July 28, 2008
Why Blog
Hard to believe that journaling is now so trendy.
Who wants to know my thoughts about random things and important things...do they matter...probably not. Yet, somehow while trying to compose a thought that is simple enough to put into words it somehow helps me to digest, understand, work thru and communicate my feelings, desires, struggles and move on. Without the power to unload I find myself powerless to reload.
Who wants to know my thoughts about random things and important things...do they matter...probably not. Yet, somehow while trying to compose a thought that is simple enough to put into words it somehow helps me to digest, understand, work thru and communicate my feelings, desires, struggles and move on. Without the power to unload I find myself powerless to reload.
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